Fly Free

I have always had an affinity for winged creatures, most especially birds.  But over this last year there has been a shift; a new and deeper appreciation that has emerged.  I have an awareness now that was not present before.  It's as if a new world has opened to me, a world that has always been there, but I was not able to see it at the time.  I realize now, that I was not a match to that world.  The world I speak of, is one of Freedom.  The birds are free... I was not.
There was nothing physically holding me captive, it was a mental prison.  One that I created many years ago.  I came to understand through my own awakening what others find so difficult to comprehend. I understood why a person who was kidnapped, after time, no longer chose to escape.  Even when granted freedom to move about by their captor, they would not run.  The prison they were in had become a mental one, which was far greater than any physical one constructed by walls or bars.
I saw through my own life experiences, beginning with childhood, how I slowly created my own mental prison. But it wasn't until I began to awaken that I was able to see this prison.  My awareness was limited and so too was my reality.  The limited perspective from which I viewed the world, was crippling on many levels.  But it was through this limitation that I eventually started to seek a new perspective.  There is a knowing deep within you, it is your soul calling to you to awaken.  As you move through each life experience, you move toward awakening, until finally, one of these life experiences triggers a profound shift to take place within you.  Once the shift happens within, the outer world reflects this beauty back to you!!!
The inner and outer are always a match.
And so it is with great joy that I now experience what feels like the same Freedom the birds convey when they are  in flight.  My heart literally soars with them as I watch them move in perfect synchronicity, like a beautiful well choreographed dance.  For me, it is one of the most beautiful sights I behold on a daily basis.

photo by Justin Mackin 

Each time I am blessed with this experience I feel tremendous gratitude in my heart, and I know this is why I see it that much more.  They are my angels who remind me each day how beautiful the world is and how free we really are when we just let go.  I think each of us are traveling along our own road seeking to discover what we've know all along....we are Free.

The Nature of Love

My magnificent trip to Ireland was a profound experience for me on many levels.  I am quite sure this trip will  become a topic of sorts on more than just a few occasions, if only to illustrate the amazing growth that it inspired.  I would be remiss if I did not speak of the experience that lead me to the awareness of the incredible power that lies within.  That power I speak of, is love.   Make no mistake, it is a power.  One that is far greater than most of us dare to imagine. However often it is written about in poems or heard throughout a romantic lyric, or even spoken as the word of our religious texts, can we truly comprehend the magnitude of what  inspired those words?
Let me begin by going back around twenty years. It was 1995, I was quite young, in my early twenties. I was just starting out in life as a young adult. Having just moved into my new home, I was eager to start gardening. I knew very little about plants, but what I did know, was what I liked and what I didn't like!  There, standing in my front yard was a bush that I did not like.  I had no idea what type of plant it was, I only knew that having it there was bothering me. It just didn't fit into my fixed parameters of aesthetic beauty. I decided I would dig it up.  As much as I didn't like this plant, I couldn't bring myself to just  let it die. So I replanted it as far back as I could, in my backyard...in an ivy patch.
There it sat.  For over twenty years, this plant sat.  It did not die, it did not grow, it just sat.  Not a single bloom, ever. Over those last few years, my life was going through a very difficult stage, the demise of my marriage.  It was a rough time, and my mind was in shut down mode. For years I was just going though the motions, sleep walking, although I had no awareness of my sleep. Needless to say, I had forgotten about this plant.  Out of sight, out of mind. But that was about to change.  My mind was on the cusp of a new frontier, a true awakening.
This is where my trip to Ireland comes in.  I was staying at a charming little hotel on Caragh Lake. My mom and I were one of two sets of guests who were staying there that weekend.   It was over breakfast, where I had the pleasure of meeting the other two ladies, also from the states. As fate would have had it, (because there are no coincidences), I met Gladys.  The two of us shared a like minded view of the world and the power of the mind; the law of attraction!!  She told me about a book entitled, "What the Bleep do we Know?"  I have no doubt, that my meeting with Gladys was an important connection.  She was a messenger!  The book she shared with me, changed my life.  I was so ready to hear what it had to say!!  I must admit, I  absolutely love when, "you are asking" and the universe "is answering".  In my heart I was asking for more answers to the questions that were deep within me and as I became more aware, more in tune with my higher self, I was able to see when the flow of responses would arrive!!!
I learned so much from this amazing book, but the part I want to share with you is what I learned from Masaru Emoto and his experiments with water.  Mr. Emoto exposes the water to different messages.  Some water received messages of love, while other samples were given the opposite.  The water that was the recipient of loving and kind words apparently formed beautiful crystals when frozen and observed under a microscope, not so for the water that received the unloving messages.  I was deeply moved and effected by Mr. Emoto's studies.  I am quite sure that there are many who will doubt what his evidence has shown. But there will always be those who see things differently.  We have to follow our own truth.
 His words resonated with such truth for me, that it created a new awareness, or rather I now felt a connection to a deeper truth that was always within me.  This was what drew my attention back to my plant, the one that I had forgotten about so long ago.  I was suddenly very much aware of what my thoughts had done.  All I kept thinking about was the unloving way in which I viewed this plant.  How I was so unable to see it's beauty. With this new perception and a sense of great remorse I stood before my "rhododendron" bush and offered it great love.  I saw it's beauty for the first time.  I felt like I had been taught an incredible lesson. A lesson on  how we choose to see things.  I realized that just because I was unable to see the beauty of this plant, that didn't mean it never existed.  It was always there, whether I could see it or not.  Amazingly now, I did see it as beautiful.  I had changed, and so the way I saw things had changed as well.
What followed in the days to come, was nothing short of miraculous.  I don't remember exactly how much time went by, but it wasn't long before that rhododendron began to grow, and it wasn't just growing, it was flourishing!!!!  It bloomed for the first time in over twenty years!!!!!!!  A multitude of lavender blossoms, an incredible sight to behold.

 I have continued to show love to my beautiful rhododendron bush and not for any other reason other than, I truly love this plant and I have such gratitude for it's presence and all that I have learned.  I feel as though "she" was my teacher and I was the student.  In has been six years and "Rhoda", as I like to call her, has grown to over three times her size.  Amazing what the power of love can do.
Even as we approach the month of December, there is always a blossom that she shares with me.

Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder

A few years ago, I took a trip to Ireland.  It was my first time there, as well as my first time out of the country. Up until that point, I had not figured out a way to afford myself the opportunity to see the world. This was my very first step towards achieving that goal.  Although there's a strong possibility I may not see the entire world, I do dream of traveling to many spectacular destinations and soaking in the essence of their beauty.
 This having been my first trip to another country, I was in awe.  I could feel the energy of the land and the people who lived there, past and present. I was told before I arrived, how much I would enjoy the Irish, and indeed I did.  They were as warm and as kind as I had been lead to believe, not as guarded as one might expect others to be.  Almost as if  "strangers" did not exist.
As I traveled across the countryside I saw beauty everywhere.  It was wonderful to drive along the winding roads and explore the many sights. I had the freedom to stop along the roadside and document with my camera what my eye was observing.  I really wanted to just breathe and stay completely present but I knew this was a special moment in time for me.  A time that I would most definitely want to preserve, so I could share, look back on, and cherish with others.
As I was preparing to leave for Ireland, a well intended friend suggested that I skip my visit to the city of Dublin. The essence of  this friend's message was, it's just a city like any other, not much different from New York and that there were so many other beautiful sights to see. I took in this idea, allowing my mind to process what was said. But something deep inside of me, (that voice that knows better, and by "better" I mean that voice that knows You), said...no, do not skip Dublin!  I am so grateful I listened to that Voice, my Higher Self, the one who knows me better than anyone. Dublin was one of my most favorite places.  It was where I saw beauty beyond what the eye can see.  I saw the beauty that is seen with the heart.
 I know my eyes are connected to my heart and it is why I tend to cry so easily.  When my heart is feeling deeply, the tears just begin to flow.  I have learned to embrace those tears.  I know there will come a time when my heart will remain open and tears will no longer be required to such a great extent. It is then, that I will be aware of my open heart and truly Love from that deep center of truth. My own truth.

One of the most beautiful sights I observed while in Dublin was an artist who was sharing his process of creation with passers by.  He was set up along a city street just outside the campus of Trinity. Most people were in a hurry and didn't take the time to stop, only a passing glance and maybe a coin tossed in his basket, but I couldn't help but stop. Maybe it was because I was in a new country and completely engaged, or maybe because I too am an artist and  was amazed by the detail of this man's work. But maybe it was because I was so moved by what appeared to be a man living his life by simply doing what he loved and sharing it with others. I think it may have been a combination of all three, but most definitely the last of these three.

 I took the time to introduce myself and connect with this wonderful soul. It was a moment that will live in my heart forever. A moment that allowed me to be filled with the grace of his beauty. I am forever moved and changed by that moment and my time spent in Dublin. They say that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I believe there is, has and always will be extraordinary beauty just waiting to be seen.  We only need choose to see with an open heart.

Awakening to the Moment

As we go through life we are often not aware of how very much we are asleep. Our eyes may be open, and we may be going through a whole host of different daily activities requiring motion, but the truth of the matter is, we are asleep.  That sleep began a very long time ago.  A time when we entered the world with a "forgetting" of who we really are.
But that "forgetting" was all a part of the plan, for without it, we would not have been able to create our own fantastic journey.  Life is after all, a journey, is it not?  It is in the moments along the way that we find out who we really are, not in the arrival, but within the individual moments that lead us moving forward. This is where we find our strength, where we grow, where we expand our consciousness. It is how we begin to awaken from our slumber. 
Some of us take longer then others but that too is all a part of the plan. Each soul at a different point in their evolution, providing spectacular contrast for the beautiful souls they encounter along the way.
The incredible challenges we encounter within our journey are all there to assist in our growth. 
As we stay present in the moment during these difficult times, we allow for solutions to unfold, trusting that there is always a way.  Aligning with your intuitive knowing through the present moment keeps you in a place of open hearted awareness. Without resistance you allow the flow of life to move through you and you in turn are going with the flow!